Lifestyle, Music

Zombie Survival Guide: Jack Garratt

He’s a multi-instrumentalist which might mean he’s good with his hands, plus he’s also got the rugged apocalypse thing going down already with his strong beard game, but you’ll never know how someone will react to a zombie until they are put in that situation. We thought it’d be a bit cruel to trap Jack Garratt in a room with a flesh hungry living corpse (plus, where would we get one?), so we just asked him what he’d do when it comes to the end of days.

You’re in Central London when you get a Sky News alert saying there’s is zombie outbreak in the capital. What is your first thought?
No f***ing clue. If I’m in a good studio, I’d lock myself in until I’d figure what to do. But that means I’d be trapped…fuck. I’d maybe go up to the roof and see what my options were.

What weapon would you choose to fight off zombies?
It wouldn’t be anything that I’d have to do with my hands because I’m not strong enough, so it would probably be some sort of firearm…if I could get my hands on one, a flamethrower! I wouldn’t think I’d be good at shooting, my arm would probably get tired. If you had a flamethrower, you could just f**k s*it up.

What form of transportation do you use to avoid zombies?
It would either be a big pimped out bus with loads of armour and s*it, or a motorbike. But I don’t know how to ride a motorbike.


Where do you hide out?
I’d go home and see if my family are ok. They’re just outside of London, so I think I could get there. I’d probably get on a bike so I know I could get on the motorway and weave in and out, try and get out the country. I don’t know exactly where I’d go, I’d probably ask my mum and dad.

What supplies do you gather?
Basics. Canned foods, nothing perishable, lots of water.

If you could make up a team of expert zombie killers, who would be in it?
Essentially you need a small team of people that are good at something. The first person that came into my head was Terry Crews, because he’s big and strong, but also intelligent. You’d want someone who could cook, so maybe Bear Grylls. Then my entire family, of course. My mum would look after everyone, my dad is very calming so he’d keep morale.

What would your end of days outfit consist of?
If I went full crazy, just a banana hammock and a shotgun shell belt draped across me with a shotgun on my back.

If supplies ran low, would you resort to cannibalism?
Hmmmmm…no. Yes? No.

If you were bitten on the arm, would you chop it off or turn into a zombie?
Chop the hand off.

What will you miss most about civilisation?
Lovely conversations like this.

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